Excerpts from a Diary
The stages and lessons of mastering chronic pain
By Betty Louise


My perspective on mastering chronic pain comes from the personal experience of having Rheumatoid Arthritis, and working with hundreds of people teaching the skills of pain self-management. My path to mastery took over 20 years, however I know that yours does not need to take that long. The following excerpts from my journal mark the stages (cycling, managing, believing) on my path to mastering chronic pain. The lessons I needed to learn to move to the next stage are also outlined. Your path will be unique, but the stages and lessons outlined here are universal.

1986-1990 – Cycling Stage

I keep cycling in pain. This is such a roller coaster...one day feeling fine and the next day flat on my back. Sometimes, I need to lay low for a week or more recovering from overdoing it on a good day. I can"t even get on the floor with Rebecca (my 2 year old) because I don"t know whether I have the strength to get up again. I can't swim because my shoulders are too inflamed and painful. This is like a horrible nightmare. What is happening to my body? Where is the answer so I can get back to my life? I"m scared!

Before I could move out of the cycling stage, I needed to accept "what is" which at this point in my life included pain.

1991-2004 – Managing Stage

Whew...my pain is leveling out. I have so many more good days than I use to...I have learned so much about taking medication as prescribed and conserving my energy which means lots of naps. I am actually making plans and following through with most of them. My body is so much stronger. I am swimming 20 laps! I am trying to listen to my body because I know all the pain is a message for me. One thing it teaches me is that life is more about my moments and less about my plans.

Moving from managing to believing took the high level of confidence. Also, I began to realize the control over how I viewed myself and adopted a more positive perspective "I am a healthy person with Rheumatoid Arthriris."

2005-2006 – Believing Stage

My healer just told me she believed I could be off of medication and out of pain, AND the amazing thing is...I believe it too. I know it will mean taking exquisite care of myself everyday. I know I have what it takes...courage, perseverance, and a strong support system. Living with pain has taught me that there is nothing to fear...I see how much I have expanded because of it. I am beginning to see that my life can be vibrant, active and alive in new and different ways.

Moving through believing and into a place of mastery meant that I saw myself as worthy soul who deserved a full rich and active life. The commitment to the year-long "Total Transformation Package" at Healus was a huge step in valuing myself and the life I desired.

2007 – Mastering Stage

Life is sweet...I don"t hear myself even use the words chronic pain and Rheumatoid Arthritis to describe me anymore. I am living fearlessly, taking bigger risks with my body and realize that my life is actually richer because of my pain.

Betty Louise (www.coachbetty.com) is a professional life coach and author who helps her clients achieve clarity and focus so they may move forward in their lives with purpose and ease.